No Motivation? The King is Calling!

I don't post here often enough because, quite often, when I sit down to write the inspiration just doesn't strike.  I usually try to force some words out and put together the semblance of a blog post, but it all sounds unnatural and wrong, so I backspace and stare at a blank screen for a while before giving up. 

Sometimes this upsets me and throws me into moments of doubt.  When I started this blog I could feel God inspiring me all the time, sometimes several times a week, or even more than once a day, but it just doesn't come that way anymore.  Do I not pray enough?  Am I reading the wrong Bible verses?  Am I not listening for God throughout the day?  I panic.  Why doesn't this come easily anymore?

I'm beginning to find that motivation and inspiration for many things in my life may not always come easily, but I have to push through it and make it work anyway.  I have to write English term papers whether or not any of the works from class inspired a literary argument in my mind.  I have to find a way to push myself through a workout whether or not I have much motivation that day.  And I should sit down and think about how God is working in my life and the world around me and take time to formulate it into words even when it doesn't come easily.

This blog has been such a gift throughout my formative years, in that it caused me to think deeply about God's presence in my life and how He was working on me, and I am so blessed that He used it to not only help me, but to reach others.  Now is my time to be faithful to Him and continue listening and using this gift that He's given me despite His voice only seeming to be a whisper.

What gifts has God given you to further His Kingdom?  Are you using them to the fullest to serve Him and those around you?  God calls each of us to serve Him in different ways, and we must answer His call to us even when we lose the motivation and inspiration.  He is constantly calling you to something, even if it isn't what you want to do or be.  He's never going to let you waste your life.  If it feels like He isn't calling you to anything listener longer and harder.  I know that He's going to use you for something great, even if you have little motivation, desire, or even ability to do it.  He will provide.  He will call.  His Kingdom will be grown.

Not How It's Meant to Be

This isn't how it was supposed to be.  This world is broken and full of evil, and this isn't how it was supposed to be.  Love is abused, the good and the young die painful deaths, and sex is used to manipulate and hurt.  Where is God in all of this?

My roommate and I were discussing one of our Humanities Core classes that deals with worldviews and difficult topics of our time such as abortion and euthanasia, and our conversation strayed to why the world contains so much evil inside of things that were designed to be good, specifically when it came to sex.  I asked her if she thought that there was sex before the Fall of Man, and we agreed that there was, because man was designed to reproduce from the start and we cited Adam and Eve in Genesis 2:24-25 "That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.  Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame."  We had the realization that though in our post-Fall society sex is often abused and sinful it wasn't designed to be that way.  I said "this isn't how it was supposed to be" and all of a sudden so many things clicked into place for me.

God created life to be beautiful, He wanted man to live in perfect harmony with Himself, one another, and the rest of creation.  But Satan in the form of the serpent stepped in and altered that order, causing evil to enter the world.  God never intended for the world to be this way.  The story of man since Genesis 3:8 has been God's work to redeem us.  He loves us and doesn't want to see us hurt, but we constantly hurt ourselves, and just by nature of living in a fallen world evil is part of our lives and is part of who we are.  That is, it is a part of who we are except for God's Redeeming Grace through Jesus Christ.

God  can use the evil in the world for His purposes, to help us to grow and to guide us to Him, but He did not cause this evil.  Man in conjunction with Satan brought this evil into the world, and then our free will continues to let it intertwine with our lives.  God's heart breaks when we are in unnecessary pain caused by the evil that He did not bring into the world.  Good things are made bad because this world is not how it was supposed to be.  This was not the original plan.  This isn't how it's supposed to be.

When we pass on from this life and enter into Heaven by God's Grace we will see how the world was meant to be.  We will meet with utter perfection.  For now, though, God has a purpose for each one of us in this fallen world in order to guide as many of us as will accept His redeeming salvation into Paradise, into the Heaven that God intended.

If He Comes Suddenly...

Praise God from whom all blessings flow;
Praise him, all creatures here below;
Praise him above, ye heavenly host:
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

 

On campus, we have times of worship that are set aside to just sing God's praises together.  It's incredible to stand in a room, or outside in the middle of God's creation in one instance, and worship the Creator all together.  I find that so many of the lessons that God teaches me comes not through the sermons and messages that I hear on Sunday mornings or in Chapel throughout the week, but through the songs that we sing to praise Him.

 

God is so deserving of worship, and no doubt He takes joy in His children when we join together to sing for Him, but our journey with God can't stop there.  At the church that I grew up in, the verse above, the Doxology, was always sung after the offering had been collected, a form of thanking God for the gifts He has given us and offering them back up to Him.  I have learned to associate this Doxology with a monetary offering, however, at the end of each worship session on campus we join together in singing the Doxology, despite the fact that no offering has been collected.

 

The first time we sang the verse together I was confused, but quickly realized that this was just yet another form of worship.  This was offering our lives up to God, rather than our money. 

 

There is so much more to following Christ than simply praising Him through song.  We must follow Him and join Him in the mission field, regardless of where we are, because the mission field is all around us.  God didn't give us the most amazing gift in the world for us to keep to ourselves, He sent His Son so that we may live in Him and spread His love to the people around us.

 

Some people are called to follow and serve Christ overseas, but so many of us are called to serve right where we are.  God is always calling us to His mission, there is no "someday" about it.  Jesus could return at any moment, and Mark 13:36 says "if He comes suddenly, do not let Him find you sleeping."  I was told by someone recently that if you aren't actively doing God's work in the world, then you aren't truly following Him.  There is so much more to worship and following God than just singing and attending Bible studies.

What I've Learned Beyond the Classroom

As I sit here in front of my computer on the eve of my high school graduation I'm not quite sure what to say.  How do you sum up eighteen years of life, or twelve years of schooling, or even just three years in high school in a blog post?  

High school was...an adventure full of highs and lows, exciting times and disappointing ones, days complete with life lessons and days totally void of purpose.  There are two lessons, I suppose I'll call them that, that I kept coming back to since tenth grade.  The first one relates directly to God, and the second isn't as direct.

I'll start with the more direct one, I suppose.  In middle school I felt so close to God, I had days that I could almost hear Him in conversation with me.  In high school, though, life began to fill with so much more than in earlier years, and I could feel God beginning to get pushed into the periphery of my life, but even when I put everything else aside and focused on God things still felt...different.  Very rarely did I feel that closeness that I used to feel in middle school, and there were moments that I began to doubt God's presence in my life.

Only recently did I truly begin to understand why this was happening.  As we progress through the stages of life, God progresses with us.  While He is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow, we are not, and because of that God reaches us in different ways.  Middle school was a time full of developing out of childhood, finding out where I fit in, and discovering who I was going to be.  It was awkward, and, at times, it was difficult to navigate, and I needed God to be, well, extremely loud and incredibly close.  While personal development continues throughout life, and certainly in high school, it's a much different experience, and we are beginning to prepare for the rest of life, gaining much more independence than in years prior.  

My faith through high school was about just that, having faith.  It was as if God was saying "Okay, we got through these three years just fine, but now you need to trust me when I tell you that I will always be near just a little bit more."  

Perhaps I can create an analogy to a story that my mom told me when we were going through photographs from my younger years.  There was a picture of me in a row boat in the lake at my grandparents' mountain home, attached to shore by a long rope.  Thinking back on that vacation I didn't remember being attached to shore, I remembered rowing independently on the lake, and I giggled, thinking that I was attached to this rope and didn't even know it.  My mom, however, told me that I had desperately wanted that rope attaching me to the shore (not that she would have let me go out unattached, anyway), that I needed to know that that rope was there reigning me in.  Middle school was like my mom's (true) version.  God was obviously there, and I was comforted by knowing without a doubt that He was with me.  High school was more like my (false) thoughts.  I didn't realize that I was attached to shore all along, but I trusted that my mom would make sure nothing bad would happen to me.  I could have gotten too far away, though, to a point where I felt like she wouldn't be able to reach me if she needed to, but all along I was attached to where she was.  I have to trust in God that He is always here, and recognize even in the times that I am unsure I am still anchored to the everlasting Lord.

The second lesson from high school is about priorities.  Tomorrow when I am beginning to tear up during Graduation it will not be because I will miss the structure of high school, or because I will miss the subjects (if I really wanted to I could take similar classes at Grove City).  I will be crying because it is a goodbye of sorts with the people who I've grown to hold so dearly.  The people in life are the important part.  God sent us here to interact and love one another, and to develop a relationship with His Son.  That is our first purpose in life, not mastering rotations and torque in Physics class (though that could be a means to fulfilling our first purpose.) 

I'm not saying that we shouldn't be focused on academics or careers, anyone who knows me knows that I would never say that those things are unimportant, but this year especially, my senior year, I've learned that it is easy to put our priorities in the wrong order.  Years from now it is unlikely that I will remember how to solve the integral of an exponential function, yet I know that I will remember the people in my life right now.  Before senior year I often put academics ahead of anything else in my life, but now I see that there are some things that can come before, or at least equivalent to, them.  There is one thing that must come before them.  God.  In all things God must be the first priority in my life. With God first, everything else will fall into place, as He'll guide me towards the proper path.

So I suppose the first lesson that I learned was about my relationship with God, and the second was about following and serving Him, neither of which is much different from the other.

Above all remember this - "For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only son, so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life." (John 3:16)

I Love You More

My senior year in high school will be starting in just a few days, and it seems like all of a sudden, there is very little in life, other than trying to plan for college and summer reading. 

The pre-college process is stressful.  I am currently looking at a short list of colleges, all of which are Christian colleges, and there are so many different details and options that have to be weighed when trying to choose the one that I want to go to.  Of course, if you know me, or if you are familiar with this blog, you'll see that I have a constant desire to know the future, to have life planned.  I have this deep urge to be able to plan everything in my life, and right now, not knowing where I'll be living or going to school in a year is quite daunting.  I haven't even visited all of the schools that I'm considering yet, but already I feel like I should have a college picked out. 

I'm so worried that I'll make the wrong choice.  What if my favorite school ends up being the most expensive?  What if I can't tell which school God wants me to be at?  Even worse, what if it really doesn't matter to God which school I go to, so long as I'm still following Him?  And how am I supposed to find extra time to pray about this process with school starting in just a few days, with my most challenging schedule yet?

And then, once I've figured out where I'll go to college, how do I figure out what I'm going to do there?  How am I going to decide what I want to do for the rest of my life?  What if I do what I love, but then I can't get a job?  What if I do what will lead to a lucrative career, but end up hating it?  How do I make all of these decisions before I'm even a legal adult?

On Wednesday, after I had just gotten home from a college visit, and feeling the pressure to know where I'll be in a year, I turned on the radio in the car, and this song came on.  There was an initial peace that fell over me when the song began, and the first verse said "I am with you wherever, and where you go is where I am."  The chorus was another part that really spoke to me.  "I love you more than the sun, and the stars that I taught how to shine, you are mine, and you shine for me too, I love you.  Yesterday, and today, and tomorrow I'll say it again, and again, I love you more."  It was like God telling me to calm down.  If He can set the stars and the sun to shine each day and night, He will surely guide me through this process.  He will guide me to the right decision, whether or not it matters to Him exactly which college I'm learning to use the gifts that He gave me to use in order to shine for Him.  He will also guide me towards finding what exactly it is that He wants me to shine with.  He loves me no matter what, and I am His.

Jesus Loves Me

Sometimes being a Christian is hard.  Sometimes it can seem like there just isn't time for it, sometimes God can feel distant, sometimes we don't understand how things in this world can happen if God exists.  Sometimes we just don't get it.

And that is okay.

Some days, we are not meant to me the hard core Christians who have it all together.  Some days, the only thing that we can and have to cling to is the fact that Jesus loves us.  When we can't keep it all together, when we just feel like falling apart, we need to focus in on one thing that will always be true and will never change, Jesus's love for us.

Nobody is perfect, no matter how much we try to be.  But the good news is that Jesus took care of all of that for us.  He is there with open arms even when we're at our worst, and sometimes, we don't need to go any further than that.

Mark 10:13-16 say "And they were bringing children to him that he might touch them, and the disciples rebuked them. But when Jesus saw it, he was indignant and said to them, “Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.” And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands on them."

Children don't worry about the things that adults begin to worry about as they grow older.  Children accept ideas without question, a feat that can sometimes be all but impossible for an adult.  Children don't usually have a difficult time questioning God's love for them, and that is somethings special.

Jesus loves us, and that is forever true.

Faith: We are Never Alone

For a while, things in my life have been going great, which makes me very happy, for obvious reasons, but it seems as though God hasn't been as close as He is during the tough times.  I've prayed, and I've read my Bible, but no matter what I did, I just couldn't find that calming reassurance that has pulled me out of the worst times in my life.  I began to get worried.  I couldn't let this separation happen, just because there aren't many challenges in my life at this moment.

I didn't want bad things to start happening, but I wanted to feel God again,  I didn't want this slow drift apart.  Then, today, Never Alone by Barlow Girl came on when I was listening to music.  At first thought, it seems like it's meant to help during the low points in our life, times when everything seems to be going wrong, when no matter what we do, we are constantly falling down.  Then I thought, no, I can connect to this, even though I've had very little to overcome recently.



It has always been fairly easy for me to have Faith in God, because there have been very few moments when I haven't felt Him, so this has been an extremely odd experience for me.  But, of course, God is still there, and that's what Faith is, isn't it?  Hebrews 11:1 says "Faith is confidence in what we hope for, and assurance in what we do not see."

I'm beginning to learn that having a strong Faith has very little to do with how we respond when we can feel God's presence, but how we respond when we cannot.  Deuteronomy 31:6 says "Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you."  God will never leave us alone.  Never.  Not when we're furious and screaming at Him, not when we've locked ourselves in our bedrooms crying, not when we're filled with nothing but joy.

Our Faith can be tested at any time, not just in our struggles, as I believed until just recently.  So even when it seems as though God has abandoned us, we must trust that He is still with us, still walking through life with us.  When we believe otherwise, we are believing lies.

Absolutely Terrifying Beauty

I'm part of a small group/Bible study for high school girls in my church, and as we were talking about having positive self-talk last night, my mom, one of our leaders, was responding to another comment that was made, and she said "Sometimes, faith is just having the courage to keep going." and for whatever reason, it has stuck with me.

Actually, I know the reason. It's because of how true it is. There are moments when the only two options that we have are to keep trying, or to quit, and in most of those situations, quitting would be so much easier. It's like life is some sort of maze, with wonders and terrors strewn through.

Sometimes it would be more fun, easier, to sit down right were we are in the maze and say, "Nope. Not anymore, God. I quit. I don't know what's coming next, and if it's anything like what's come before, I don't want it. It isn't worth it." We refuse to listen to God, and we sit stubbornly right in the middle of that maze. All we see when we look back at where we've been are the monsters that have tried to tear us apart, but what we're forgetting is that we've picked up those gorgeous gardens along the way, and keep them in our pocket right with us. So we quit. We've all been there before. I know that I sure have.

But then, there are times when we don't quit, when we trust God, and walk through this maze. We widen our eyes at ourselves, and shake our heads, in disbelief that we're actually choosing to continue on, but still we know that God has amazing things planned for us. This maze has twice as many wonders as terrors, and even more in disguise.

Sometimes it seems as though we're walking through the maze alone, or blindly, but truly, I tell you, both are lies. We are never alone, never. God does not leave our sides, not in the good times, and most definitely not in the bad times. He's no fair-weather-friend, this amazing God of ours. And best of all, not only is He with us, but God is leading us through it. If only we would let Him, He'll take our hands in His and lead us through the twists and turns. It's only when we stray from Him that we get lost and hit these dead ends, but eventually we'll find that He's following right behind us, just waiting for us to turn around and fall into His loving arms.

There's nothing more beautiful than the love of Jesus Christ, and there's nothing more terrifying than living the life that He has for you. But when you put it together you aren't left with monsters and horrors. What you're left with is absolutely terrifying beauty. And there isn't anything more amazing than that.

So, yeah, doing God's work in the world takes an explicit amount of faith, but sometimes just continuing on takes even more. You'll see, though, that He never fails, never ever, and if you just turn around in this maze, you'll see Jesus waiting with arms outstretched to hold you and love you. So answer me this, will you turn around and let Him carry you?

He Knows How Much it Hurts

This may not be a new post to some of you, though I'm not sure when the last one started to malfunction, so maybe it's new to all of you. The song that I embedded in the last one would automatically redirect to a new page, so I've switched the link, in hopes that this will cure the issue. I apologize for any issues you may have had in viewing my blog.



"He knows how much it hurts". Every time that we cry out to Jesus, "Why?" remember, that he knows exactly what we're going through. For two reasons...


1) God was human too, we call Him Jesus. Jesus lived on this very Earth, breathed this very air, and had many of these very pains. Jesus has been there, done that. He made it through, now it's our turn, and He is guiding us through it all, not leaving our sides for a single moment. "In this world you will have troubles, but take heart! I have overcome the world." ~John 16:33 and

2)God loves you so, so much, and anything that hurts you, hurts Him just as much. We cry "Lord, why are you letting this happen to me?" and He cries alongside us, knowing that we have to make it through these trials to make us stronger. God doesn't like to see us in pain, He sent his one and only son to take our places on the cross. But that doesn't mean that He's going to take away our pains and aches, because they all have a purpose in our lives. My mom often gives the analogy of an infant getting a shot at the doctor's office. That needle hurts the little baby, and he doesn't understand why his mommy or daddy let this stranger do that to him, but his parents know better. The baby's parents know that without the shot, the infant is at risk for diseases so much worse than the prick of a needle. Does that mean that the parents want to hear those cries of betrayal from their child, that it's easy for them to hear their baby cry? No, of course not, that's ridiculous, right? Right. That's what God is doing for us now. We don't understand it at this moment, but God knows that what is happening is for the better, and He knows that what is happening is better than the alternative, no matter how much it hurts the both of us.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." ~Jeremiah 29:11. Trust in the Lord, give your whole heart to Him, and praise him through the storms in your life. God is never going to let us go, so all that's left is for us to trust in him.

Our Amazing God: Time Goes On

Last year, right around this time, a lot of craziness started in my life, and it's difficult for me to believe that that was a whole year ago now, while at the time, I didn't think that it would ever end. Today I looked out of the window and saw a tree beginning to change colors in my back yard, full of bright reds and oranges and yellows, and was transported back to last year.

I had my computer staying on the dining room table during this era in my life, and I would do my homework, and work on National Novel Writing Month outlines and whatnot each afternoon in this room with this big window facing this big beautiful colored tree. I watched as it went up in flames in the oranges and reds of Fall, then as the leaves fell one by one to the ground, Winter approaching slowly. Then, as if to prove that there was still life under those mounds of snow, I watched this tree slowly bud into small flowers that quickly turned to healthy green leaves, the image of the reds and oranges from Fall stuck in my head for all of these months. Throughout all of the junk in my life during this time, it was the image of that tree that was running through my head constantly, and now I see why.

The tree began to change colors again just a day or so ago, and I am beginning to see the bright colors of Autumn once again, and I can not believe all that has happened in these twelve months. I think this is God's way of showing me that it was truly Him who got me through those trials, even when I thought I was alone, He never left me. Now I look at myself, and I'm a different person because of it, and a much better trust in God. If only I had stopped pushing against our Creator in my time of trouble, and trusted that time would move on and that He would bring me through it, I would have had a much happier year. Every Autumn when this tree begins to change, I will watch it, and take a few moments to praise our wonderful God.

I wasn't stuck in that time of troubles, and neither are you. I know it's difficult to look past the here and now when you're in those moments, believe me, I know, but God has your back in everything. Remember, time moves on, and with time, God brings healing. Let the fiery trees that will soon be surrounding us remind you that God's love for us burns brightly and fiercely, and that He will never let us go.

Our Amazing God: The Screenplays of Our Lives

This isn't how you planned it, is it? Because this surely isn't how I planned it.

That screenplay that I wrote just isn't turning out how it was supposed to. Yeah, that test grade was supposed to be an A. And my alarm should have woken me up on time. Oh, don't forget that my social life should be perfect, my friends shouldn't stir up drama, and I shouldn't have to be choosing between the lesser of two evils. My life wasn't supposed to be this complicated!

Don't we all find ourselves screaming at God sometimes, whether it be in confusion, or anger, or whatever, about how our lives should have been different. That they should have turned out exactly as we wanted, not this confusing thing filled with rights and wrongs and futures and pasts? School, work, church, everything should be a breeze, right? Everything should be as it is in the script of our minds.

Well, as I'm learning, that just isn't how the Lord works. God always has something bigger in mind than what we can even imagine. He is always answering our prayers, just maybe not in the way we thought He would. Maybe it is a "yes", maybe it's a "not yet", or maybe it's an "I have something better planned". The question is, are we willing to accept how God answers us?

If we don't accept anything but a "yes" to our prayers, of course it's going to seem like God hasn't heard our prayers. I know that I have this picture perfect movie life planned for myself, and as much as I yearn for my life to turn out like this, I can almost guarantee that I will not have the life that plays in my head. God is going to throw things in my path that I'm not expecting, and if I'm willing, He's going to use each and everything that He places in my life for a purpose. That goes for each and every person placed in this beautiful world.

God's plan for our lives isn't the same plan that we have for our own lives, but His is most definitely the best plan to follow.

All of Creation

Almost three years ago now, a video was shared during youth group, and I've been looking for it ever since. Yes, there are other's done like this one, but I found that this one touches me the most. I've finally found it, and it has brought tears to my eyes once again.



There are so many thoughts going through my head after watching, and it's so difficult to fathom. God loves us. Plain and simple, yet, at times it's the most confusing thing. How could God love someone who's sinned so much? Who's turned away from him time and time again? Who is so broken and beaten down? God loves us. No matter what. And, in addition to that, He's always fighting for us. God is going to be there to pull us out of those deep and fiery pits of life whenever we are willing to accept His grace and love.

Towards the end of the video, you see the actor who's playing God trying to pull the girl towards him, but no matter how hard she tries, she just can't get through those people. Finally, God goes in and fights each of the evils off of her, and holds the girl up, protecting her from evil. God wants to do that and be there for each of us too. He's longing, yearning, for us to want him, to turn to him, and accept his love and care.

The sign outside of my church reads "If God feels distant, stop running". This video and that quote go perfectly together. God is chasing after us, and He wants us to stop and turn around, and let Him hold us in His hands. The only thing that's stopping Him is us. We need to make that decision to let him into our heart, and to give Him our troubles.

It doesn't matter who you've been, or what you've done. The only thing that matters is who God is, and what He's done. Jesus Christ died on the cross, for us, and that is exactly what true love is.

Stress Fractures

So I'm reading one of the things that one of my friends wrote on facebook. There was a question "Have you ever had your heart broken?" her answer was "cracked, but not broken" and that made me think a lot. How many of us are walking around with cracks in our hearts?

We haven't been completely broken, we haven't been kicked and left behind in the dirt, but we've been hurt. A friend has turned out to be someone we didn't know, a short-term relationship has ended, the truth of a lie surfaces, life moves on, right? Of course it does. But that doesn't mean that we're okay.

I find that a lot of times, it's even more difficult to get over small aches like that. Things that hurt, but that don't completely cause an earthquake in your life, because we don't take the time that we need to heal. We aren't focused on it for a very long time, so months, or even years, later it resurfaces, and we realize that it is still causing us pain. This little, minor detail in our lives can bring us to our knees, weeping, so long afterwards. Okay, so maybe I'm being a little dramatic, even a lot dramatic, but you get my point.

Perhaps you are like me, when something bad happens, something that hurts just enough to affect your life, but not enough to bring you to a stand still, you start working on auto-pilot, speed up, and don't stop for long enough to reflect and heal. Or maybe you are walking around in this life full of small little aches and pains from small bad experiences, added together making you feel miserable. Maybe you are totally different. But no matter what, you haven't taken the time to make yourself feel better.

When these pains resurface months later, we try to push it away again, convincing ourselves that we should have been over this long ago, that we can't possibly still be being affected by it now. But guess what, if you've never dealt with a certain experience, it's not leaving your side until you have, and it's only going to grow into a bigger pain.

These little experiences are like getting a stress fracture in your foot from running too much. If you take the time to allow it to heal, you'll be back up and running in no time at all. But if you don't stop to let your body heal itself, and you keep running, that stress fracture is going to get bigger and bigger, and soon enough it's going to be a full blown broken bone. Your foot is going to hurt a lot more than with just a small stress fracture, and it's going to take a much longer time to heal. Plus, there's no ignoring it this time.

So I have two pieces of advice for you, and for myself. The first one is to those of us who have been bottling our pains up for too long, and now we must deal with a lot more hurt than we thought. Always remember Psalm 34:18 "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in spirit". Give your troubles to God. He loves you, and He wants to always be there for you. And guess what. It is okay to hurt, even after all of this time. There isn't a time limit to brokenheartedness or crushed spirits. So let it all go, and give it all to God.

And the second advice is to those of us who are in the middle of a little ache right now. Deal with it now. Ask God to help you heal right now, don't hold it all in for months and months, only for it to resurface even worse. Even if it doesn't necessarily seem major, God doesn't care. Like I said in my earlier post, He loves you, and He wants to always be there for you. A crisis is a crisis if it's a crisis to you. Don't feel like what you're going through is too small to hurt over. Hurt and heal now, before it gets even worse.

Everyone who is walking around with a cracked heart, take the time to let it heal and let God help you. Don't let your heart break into a million pieces before you turn to God.

More to Us

I can't undo the things that led us to this place

But I know there's something more to us than our mistakes

How difficult is it for everyone to look past mistakes? To look beyond imperfections? To ignore faults? It's seemingly impossible. Trying to find the good, and overlooking the bad, is probably one of the most difficult things that we'll try to accomplish in our lifetimes. I know that it's one of my worst struggles.

I have a tricky time trying to realize that it isn't our mistakes that define us, regardless of who I'm thinking about, myself or others. I tend to be extremely tough on myself, and I don't always see that I mean more than how I've messed up. Because I am so tough on myself, I can also be somewhat tough on other people as well, though maybe not quite as bad. There are times when I know that I've had enough, but there other times when I've just been putting ridiculous expectations on people, events, occurances, everything.

Somehow our mistakes, and our accomplishments, have led us to where we are right now, this very moment. We've lived and we've learned. There is no going back. No undoing things that have already been done. No way to change what's already happened. None at all. No re-do's or do-overs allowed.

So sometimes, we're left pondering how we've gotten ourselves into such a big mess. How did we get here? Where did I go wrong? Or maybe you know exactly what happened. Maybe you know exactly where the turning point was, where your mistake, or mistakes, were made. Either way, it isn't fun knowing that you've messed up, and often times, we dwell on what we've done to the point of exhaustion. We let our anger at ourselves, or at others, eat away at us. It does no good.

There is so much more to us than the mistakes that we've made. We each have so much to offer the world, so much that makes us special and unique. Hidden talents, unveiled hobbies, different interests. Not one of us is the same, and we are in this world for a reason. We cannot spend our whole lives regretting, we'll miss out on so much, and the world needs us.

You think your mistakes are too big? That there's no way to get past them? That they are trapping you? Please, please think again. You are worth so much more than that miniscule mistake, no matter how big it seems to you. Acts 13:38 says “Therefore, my friends, I want you to know that through Jesus the forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you." God loves you, and He has already forgiven you. Don't close yourself into a box, but go out into the world, and be your precious self.

Now I'm in our secret place

Alone in your embrace

Where all my wrongs have been erased

You have forgiven

The quote at the beginning of this post is from the Skillet song "Believe" and the quote at the end of this post is from the Skillet song "Forgiven".

Gratitude Journal-Day 4

Gratitude Journal-Day 4

So today I've been thinking about traditions, and different seasons. I'm extremely thankful for the things that make certain times of the year oh so special. There are certain things that have happened year after year for me during certain holidays or times of the year, and it makes me so happy when they happen again, and so excited for them to happen. The Christmas music that I listen to every year makes my heart swell, and though I so desperately want to listen to it earlier and earlier this year, I have to stop myself, because if I don't, then it's not as special anymore, and it loses the meaning for me. There are certain things that I will not allow to be changed. For instance, as we were getting the house ready for Thanksgiving tomorrow, my dad suggested that we make the cranberry chutney tonight, instead of tomorrow, and I instantly said no. Every year for almost as long as I can remember, I wake up on Thanksgiving morning, get dressed, and go downstairs and help my daddy make the cranberry chutney. I am so thankful for the traditions and memories of different holidays and times of the year that make life so special!

Gratitude Journal-Day 3

Gratitude Journal-Day 3

Today I'm really thankful for people. People who I don't know, people I do, I'm just thankful that God put us all here in this world together. Today I went to a flea market with two of my best friends, and there was a man there selling phone cases, he had cases for all three of our phones, and he was really nice. It made my day seeing somebody in such an upbeat mood!

I'm really grateful for the ability to solve conflicts. God sends us little trials to get closer to Him, and He also gives us the ability to overcome the trials. It's not always noticeable, but there is always a way out. "This, too, shall pass"

Gratitude Journal-Day 2

Gratitude Journal-Day 2

I'm extremely thankful for my memories. A lot of who I am can be found in the memories I have. The best times of my life so far are in my memories, and I never want to have to give them up. When so many things have changed, the past is the one thing that will always be the same no matter what, and even if things are going badly now, I can look back and think about amazing fun things from my past. My memories are a humongous comfort to me, and I constantly think about them. I don't think I'm the only one who thinks about the past a lot, but I believe that I am one of the only people who looks back on the past for comfort. Even some of my saddest memories can make me smile, because they brought me closer to somebody, or because things are better now.

I'm grateful for the present, too. The time I have to live right now is a gift, and we can never be sure of how much longer we'll have to live. I'm thankful that I have time to spend with the people in my life, and time to get to know God better.

Another thing that I'm extremely thankful for is my Christian faith and the love of Jesus. Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior, and there isn't anything better than that, nothing compares to Him. God will always be there for me, and He will always love me. He loves us so much that He sent His one and only begotten Son to die for us.